An Authentic Journey

Today I want you to become aware that you already possess
all the inner wisdom, strength and creativity needed to make
your dreams come true. 

                                                  Sarah Ban Breathnach
                                                  Simple Abundance  1995

Vintage Tin Collection: Pine cones

For more than twenty years, I have traveled the Simple
Abundance journey.  I never tire of the journey
because each year I discover nuggets of truth. Maybe as
I get older, I am more accepting of the reality before me. 
Before Sarah Ban Breathnach
and I traveled together with Simple Abundance,
we shared another journey with a book she penned:  
Mrs. Sharp's Traditions:
Reviving Victorian Family Celebrations of Comfort and Joy.

Vintage Tin Collection: Needlepoint

In the early 90s, I was a stay-at-home mom raising
two little boys.  My husband, at the time, traveled extensively
for work.  The isolation I felt was related to his travel was really
related to an emotional ocean between us.  I walked on eggs shells
because I felt my emotional need was too great. My desire for intimacy
in the marriage relationship and a creative outlet was suffocating.
 

Vintage Tin Collection: Flower Needlepoint

My family and close friends were far away. Southern California
culture was foreign. People from all over the world work and live
in Southern California but their stay is temporary.  I accept the
superficial nature, even admire the autonomy, I rarely run
into anyone I know, but it taken 30 years. 
Their roots, like mine,  for the most part, aren't here. 

There were other stay-at-home mothers in my neighborhood
but they were older and more sophisticated. They weren't interested in
the domestic arts or gardening.  For the most part, they had housekeepers,
nannies, and gardeners. This was a desolate time for me.

Vintage Tin Collection: Red Reindeer

I was a homemaker in my mid-20s, I didn't "do lunch"
or play golf. What I wanted to do was play with my boys,
plant a garden, make mud pie messes, decorate and bake cookies
with my children, visit used book and furniture stores. Mostly
I wanted to create but I didn't know it.  My badges of honor
were an accidental green food coloring stain on the kitchen
wood floor and a pantry where I sponge painted, stenciled
teapots, and added the words...Happiness is in the journey. 
They were private attempts of quietly comforting my authentic self. 

From 1990 - mid 1995, I tried to satisfy the desires
of my soul by attending creative classes at every
venue I could find.  There was sewing, embriodery,
rug hooking, jewelry making, cooking, canning,
tole painting, and quilting. But just as I was making
like minded friends, my days of watching Oprah
and putting the roast in the oven at 3:00 pm were numbered.
In May of 1995, as the result of the economic downturn,
I returned to work out of necessity.  This was the same
year my boss gave me Susan Branch's Christmas from
the Heart of the Home.

But it wasn't until 2007, while on maternity leave with
my fourth and last child, that I discovered world of
blogs of creative community filled with like minded
women.  Although much younger than me,
these women had desires similar to those I
had so many years before and they
were thriving in creative lives. 

Yes, everything you need is already in you.
It was there all along.